Counter-Psychology.

Now Playing: Watercolour - Pendulum.

Sometimes it takes a lot of thinking for one to realise that they need not think any further.

What I’m trying to say here is that people tend to overthink things, myself included. Ever since I made my Resolution, I have come to notice a few things changing in my life. As of today, the 10th of July of the year 2010 at 2:38AM I have achieved an inner light.

This inner light that I speak of is the reason I have come to be who I am. Today, my tenacity was tested beyond all belief. I was put into numerous situations where perceptions were the key, and I was having ample trouble understanding why I had come to these paths. If I was to cross these paths again in the future, I would be left with nothing more or less than a taste of sanity, right? Wrong. It is 100% the opposite, where-in this test may have driven me utterly insane.

Because of this, I have come to realise that it is not only my path that will be difficult, but the paths that cross mine. As I glance over to my bed and see my girlfriend sleeping there (albeit not so peacefully at times), I have come to understand my responsibilities as a man. That I have an obligation to myself and to her. The obligation that I will be the best person that I can be, no matter what it takes. I will always experience the highest highs and the lowest lows but the difference this time is that I will embrace BOTH the high and the low EQUALLY.

In this case, I will NEVER overthink the reasons for which said situation is a highpoint or a lowpoint. I will let all fear (if any) subside. I will, without rushing, but with speed, decipher all riddles in my path and accomplish my goals. I will overcome all hurdles with ease, because it is a requirement that I remain at my peak to face all challenges head on. Ever since my previous injuries, ailments and illness, I have still emerged stronger than before.

Keeping all of this in mind, I can say that I have accomplished a part of my Resolution. I have reclaimed my sanity, morality and tenacity. I am able to keep my cool and vent where necessary, understand the correct difference within right and wrong while not having to do a wrong to make it right and through sheer grit, I have been able to stay strong even through the hardest of times. Times where I have been unable to rely on no one but my own ability (even where it may seem impossible to face alone), I have smashed the obstacle with ease and continued on my way.

While it may take a long while to regain all the time I have lost, and many people will always question my motives, my stories, my past, present and future. I will keep my head high, I will press on. I will never forget and I will never give up.

I will remember who I am and what I can do.

I walk alone.
I walk with pride.
I know nothing will break my stride.
I am DRIVEN.
I will see you all from the top of the stairwell to contemplation.

I am.
AKS.